This post was inspired by Topic 32 from Topical Tuesday´s My Year Competition Challenge. I will not be entering of course, because I can design a site for myself anytime.
Then I was invited to spend a few months living in the Findhorn Community in Scotland. It was a life changing experience. I discovered my passion for the Environment, which in turn lead me to discover GeoSciences.
For a long time I have held the ambition to live abroad. This came to fruition in the latter part of the decade. I found my beatiful but now OAP horse a new home with a really nice lady, packed my bags, and left for pastures new. I had some knowledge of the language and, unlike most Brits who relocate abroad, I had plans to master the language. Especially when I rapidly discovered I had seriously over-estimated my capabilities.
The next few years were plagued with problems – financial, personal, cultural… Good times were had though. I met some interesting people, I ate some seriously awesome local cuisine, and I spouted off to my hearts content about Brits who failed to mindle with locals. I mingled, a little too well on occasion I believe.
In 2008 I added domestic violence to my list of experiences. I also miscarried twins, quite far into the pregnancy. I pulled through although I am still battling to keep the gentleman in question out of my life. It seems he doesn´t concider domestic violence a cause to end a relationship.
2009 saw me once again return to website design and, finally, I am making a go of it – helped significantly by a far more profressional attitude to my work. I am developing a loyal clientbase and am now helping those who are not technically minded run and maintain their blogs without having to worry about updating, upgrading, backups or error messages. I deal with all that so they dont have. Its quite fun actually. In fact my blog maintenance clients are taking over my schedule by a significant margin!
So, I have looked back. What about looking forward? For the new decade I have some serious plans. Not only do I plan to return to UK, probably Southern England, but I also plan to try and find work in a design studio. I´d love to broadan my horizons and develop my skills. Even if that means a tiny wage.
I would also like to further my interest in Geo & Environmental Sciences.
Thats it for me. If you´d like to consider taking part in the current competition challenge take a look at Topical Tuesday.
This post was inspired by Topic 32 from Topical Tuesday´s My Year Competition Challenge. I will not be entering of course, because I can design a site for myself anytime.
As I wrote my entry yesterday I realised just important my archives are to me. I had previously deleted them, in a mad symbolic gesture to mean I was moving on and leaving the past behind. But the past defines who I am today, and to a certain extent I will never leave that behind. So, I am returning the archives gradually, but only the select entries that I still have tucked away.
Yesterday I left off where I mentioned the significance of animals in my life. I have always loved animals, and I love nothing better than to sit and watch Nature Programmes, Steve Irwins old programs… The bio-diversity on planet Earth fascinates me. We live on such an amazing planet, don´t you think?
My love of animals lead me to become Vegetarian again in 2001, and eventually to follow through and become Vegan in 2002. The only problem is, despite researching diet and nutrition more thoroughly than I had done since my last attempt (at 14) I once again became severely anaemic. In the end I was forced to abandon my attempt and return to the land of guilt ridden meat eating. I have ethical issues with the idea of eating meat, no matter how natural to the human condition it appears to be. This is worsened by knowledge and experience of working with animals, and knowing just how poor the actual meat production process is. At the moment I try to only eat organic ethically produced items, but I know that once I return to the UK I will probably return to Veganism once again. I generally try to avoid drinking milk anyway, and prefer to drink Oat/Rice or Soya Milk. I do love Cheese however, especially Feta, and Vegan Cheese never quite lives up to expectations!!
January 2003 started off really well. I broke my leg on the 25th January 2003. I´ve survived more falls off horses than I can count, usually without injury (though admitedly with some painful repercusions). My broken leg, rather ironically, was a result of climbing down from a stack of straw. How humilating. The coming few months were a nightmare as Mum and I struggled to look after two highly strung horses with little or no help from family, friends or fellow owners.
Late October 2003 see me returning to university yet again in a vague attempt to complete my History degree. Only years later do I realise the reason I cannot complete it is because I´m not all that interested. I love to read about the past, especially Medieval History, but to study the subject is a different ball game entirely. By this time I have already been to four universities and frequent utterings of “She has the intellect to go far, but lacks the commitment to complete” start to appear in reports. Most recently I realised that the only reason I chose to study History was becase a lecturer told me I had a talent for it, and so I steam rollered ahead and chose that subject to pursue to university. Its a self-fulfilling prophecy of its own kind, gone wrong. I did have a talent for it, I can waffle extremely well in Historical babble. I just don´t enjoy doing so, and ask any of my friends and they will tell you. Eliza has a very short attention span.
So I never completed that History Degree. I had my Equine Science one completed of course, which is really worth the paper its written on, really…
I played at formalising my qualifications in Website Design & Interactive Media, eventually finishing by doing it part-time.
I´ve found my niche now however, but I will discuss this in Part III.
In 2004 my Mum was d¡agnosed with Breast Cancer and I had a breakdown resulting in three months in Hospital. 2004 was hard to endure. When the cancer treatment was over I, well, I brokedown. I spent Christmas 2004 and New Year 2005 in Hospital. I was suffering from severe depression, and for a while at least, various Doctors debated diagnosing Bipolar. I lost a lot at that time. I had been working in design for sometime, I had built up a steady income from design and hosting. I lost nearly all of it because there was no one there to pick up the pieces when I was incapable. For a while at least I also felt I had lost most of my friends.
During this Sam, one of the Jack Russel´s we bought in 2004, was given away to a new Mum. Jezebel was sold on. Both with my consent.
The next five years was spent piecing all that back together. Depression would return, but this time in moderation and I could cope.
Thats it for Part II. Part III tomorrow.
This post was inspired by Topic 32 from Topical Tuesday´s My Year Competition Challenge. I will not be entering of course, because I can design a site for myself anytime.
In just over a year I will have been blogging a decade, not consistently, but blogging all the same. The last ten years have been difficult and I cannot say with any degree of honesty than I have derived a great deal of enjoyment out of them. Its a shame when one looks back and feels that way. I have had my moments, but they were brief and altogether too infrequent.
I have always maintained a written journal. It has, like my blog, been neglected and cast aside more times than I can count. But every so often I will draw it out and write my most personal thoughts. Once or twice, when people have happened to come across it, there have been problems and a great deal of hurt caused as a result. In order to complete this post I read over many of these journals. It was difficult.
The funny thing is I remember the 31st December 1999 like it was yesterday. Maybe this is because it was such an important event – the conclusion of a century. I stood in the window of my home and watched the fireworks fill the sky at the stroke of midnight, and I cried. I cannot say why, I was not depressed that night, I was expectant and hopeful that this century would be full of new discoveries and wonder. I was planning to return to university.
I had a horse. He cost a small fortune to buy and a large fortune to maintain. I know now that I should have sold him and cut my losses then, but emotion has always guided my actions. In the case of my beautiful Irish Sports horse this was definitely the case.
The highlights of the coming years were meeting some of most amazing people, some of whom I am proud to refer to as friends to this day. Sarah, poor girl, has had to tolerate me for a long time! Its hard to believe we have been friends for a decade! Others I still hear from occasionally via email or facebook – Iain, Keir, and Andy. They were the guys who made the opening to the century special. Sarah, Keir, Iain and I spent one rather boozy weekend in classy Blackpool!
The year 2001 saw me once again guided by my emotions when I purchased an undernourished Romany Cob. She was in a very poor state, and basically looked like a skeleton covered in patchy black and white hair. She was weak, listless and covered in lice. I almost walked away from her because I believed her beyond saving, and then the most amazing thing happened. She raised her head proudly, turned, and trotted round the field. The movement was the most spectacular I have seen in a yearling. She was beautiful. Problem is by the time I returned with the horsebox her condition had worsened and for a long time it was touch and go. But we won, Jezebel and I, we beat the odds together. I am proud to say she is now a healthy, happy ten year old with a new Mum. I am proud of that achievement. The vet told me that another day without help and she almost certainly would have died.
The beginning of the decade saw a new passion enter my life – website design. It all began when I started my first weblog. By absolute chance I fell upon the blog Tinmanic.com and was immediately fascinated. I started my own blog the very same day, although with considerably less success. Such as I am I was not happy to simply have a standard template, I had to learn how to make them. The early years, much like today (and this current theme) was a course of trial and error. I bought books on design, css, php, colour usage, and eventually graphic design and Photoshop. I was, and still am, obsessed with knowing more. My first blog was powered by Blogger. I soon became frustrated with its unreliability and lack of performance and moved to Movabletype. Then PMachine, Expression Engine and most recently Wordpress. I have used Wordpress most consistently, but rather ironically only recently on my personal blog.
One of the most consistent aspects of my life during the last ten years has been the presence of animals. Be they horses, hamsters, cats, dogs, rats or guinea pigs – they have always been there. During the course of the ten years here are the animals I have loved and sadly, lost.
Hamsters : Geraldine, Griselda, Georgie, Little Guy, Wombat, Jordan, Gemima
Rats : Hansel, Gretel, Merry, Pippin, Buffy
Guinea Pigs : Colin, Gerald, Esmae
Horses : Irish Pryde, Jezebel
Cats : Kypa Filleta
Goldfish/Catfish : Grotty Gilbert, Gregory
South American Tree frogs :: Pip & Squeak
Dogs :: Joe, Sam
Out of all them Joe is with us. Sam lives with someone else. Jezebel has a new Mum. The rest are long gone.
Part II tomorrow. Now I have to return to work!
Side note :: The current theme has numerous errors. Sorry, its very unprofessional of me I know.
This entry was inspired by blog meme Topical Tuesday and its current topic 3D.
3D is making a comeback again. Terrific. Immediately my gut reaction, another Hollywood money making gimic created to make us look as idiotic as we actually are. Its the same old thing brought back time and time again, with just a marginally new angle. Granted there is a lot of positive feedback, but still I am inclined to believe it is little more than a cinematic way of parting us with our hard earned cash.
The notion of 3D is appealing, but it never fully lives up to expectations. Not entirely anyway. I have the residing nightmares from watching Jaws in 3D, thats enough to last any sane individual a lifetime. News of a Halloween 2010 3D. Hmm, a barely concealed way of drawing people back into the genre.
I hate to be the cynic, and whilst the notion does have appeal for certain movies, it just grabs me as a gimic to draw a declining audience back into the cinemas.
Something that really is exciting is next weeks idea for Topical Tuesday – and its a special edition for all those nanowrimo participants and followers. If you want to know more you´ll just have to check the blog on Tuesday now won´t you?!
Yesterday I moved to Hostgator because they were the greenest host I could find at a price I could afford. Here are my initial thoughts.
The Transfer
Last time I moved hosting companies it was an absolute nightmare. I had to copy the content of 23 different sites and manually transfer every single one. I hit error after error during cpanel and mySQL backups. It was hell. Loyalty aside, it was also the secondary reason why we were so reluctant to leave APTHost. Up until recently they have been reliable and extremely helpful, even when I have had difficulties outside their normal support coverage. But the green issues weighed heavy on my conscience – that and some recent reliability issues.
But I digress, I was talking about our transfer with Hostgator. I didn´t lift a finger. Hostgator moved all eleven of my sites over for me, and I just sat back and waited for the go ahead to change my nameservers. It was, well, it was awesome. More importantly they did this free of charge.
First Day
Things went so well in fact I think I was looking for a problem. So when I encountered an error this morning during what should have been a routine upgrade I immediately assumed it must be caused by their configuration. I only briefly looked into other possibilities, never thinking that the solution was actually right before my eyes. Naturally it came to me eventually, but not until I was left feeling rather ashamed of myself. Needless to say however Hostgator were helpful and polite during the whole scenario. What must they think of me!
The sites are operating quickly. They are working. After only a day there is not a great deal you can say on that score. On the issue of reliability I will of course keep you informed.
What they offer
I have a reseller account which basically means I am free, if I should so wish, to resell hosting. I can setup accounts via whm, and with the generous allowance I am given host a significant number. WHM is easy to use and runs the latest stable version.
Each account I setup has its own CPANEL which comes packed with a whole variety of useful features – the most important to me as a blog designer and host is fantastico. This allows myself and my clients to install and upgrade Wordpress with one click. All the usual applications via fantastico features – from forums & cms to ecommerce solutions.
Prices
Hosting prices start off at just $4.95 per month.
Reseller prices start at $24.95 per month
Autumn offer is 20% off for those utilising coupon code AUTUMN. I however was given a coupon by a friend, not sure how long it will be in operation, but CACTUS allowed me my first month free.
If you are looking to move hosts, are unhappy with your current provider or are looking for a greener alternative, then do check out Hostgator.
[Cross Post]
This entry was inspired by Topical Tuesday´s latest suggestion!
Funny this topic should crop up at the moment, particularly because I have been staying up into the early hours working on various projects I have in the pipeline. Problem is I am not a person who can really sleep in. Regardless of what time I go to bed I wake up at 8am. Maybe it was because for years I owned horses, which meant an early rising every single morning at 6am.
First thing on a morning when I wake I am unable to eat. Even the thought of food will repulse me, and as for the smell, well… If, on rare occasions, I am hungry and try to eat I have problems with “texture”. I will have a coffee or tea, depending on how tired I am. Recently I have been drinking “cafe solo” like its about to go out of fashion, purely because I am so tired all the time.
I´ll shower. During the summer months, with the disturbingly hot weather, I tend to have a nice refreshing cold shower. I love it. Absolutely bliss after a hot sweaty night… In winter a longish hot shower is equally welcome.
After that, as someone who works from home, I head over to Carrefour and buy myself a fresh loaf of “pan rustica”. About mid morning when I finally am released from the horrors of food I have tostada con aceite y sal. A wonderful spanish tradition, since they too rarely have a true breakfast till mid morning. Except on a Sunday when I celebrate with “churros y chocolate”. Thick spanish hot chocolate is the best in the world as far as I am concerned. A wonderful rich dark chocolate, beautiful and thick that coats everything you dunk in it. Great on the taste buds, not so great on the hips.
This entry was inspired by this weeks topic Past, Present & Future over at Topical Tuesday. Now you have all week to take part! Do it, now!
Where were you ten years ago?
Ten years ago I had just graduated from university (give or take a few months) with a pointless qualification in equestrian science. Everything I earned was being spent on a horse who, since purchase, had proved absolutely unfit for purpose. At this stage in my life I was still clinging to the childhood dream of becoming an event rider. But I was blinded by adoration for the horse and so persisted, and it was to prove my undoing.
I was spending far too much time on a certain student site, which is where I spent Sarah, a short while before. This year, I am reminded, was the year we also met in the person!
Ten years ago I was not especially geeky. I loved computers, but had yet to become totally hooked on them – this was to come a little later.
Where are you now?
Having discovered my inner geek I now spend my days creating websites for other people. Its a living, but at the moment, not a very good one. I am in my early stages of re-starting my business after a period of sickness.
It´s not easy when you are struggling with bouts of chronic depression. A few days ago I came to the decision to delete all my old files, a symbolic move to represent a fresh start – both on my blog and in my life. Not off to a great start, but I´m sure I can have a point or two for good intentions.
Where would you like to be in ten years?
When I was 16 years old I had my life mapped out. Needless to say things didn´t exactly run according to plan. I never became an event rider, and never attended Guildhall School of Music & Drama (hell, I never even applied). Needless to say I no try and map out a life plan, on account of being much older and wiser cynical.
Ten years from now
- I will be coping with bouts of depression and will have, finally, put the past behind me.
- I will have continued to improve my skills in website design, but it will no longer be my main occupation because…
- I will have graduated my degree in Geo & Environmental Sciences and maybe even continued on to complete my masters.
- Better still I may even have written the book I have been planning for the last sixteen years.
- Microsoft will have created an operating system which actually works and Internet Explorer will have been phased out entirely.
- Bill Gates will have had an unfortunate accident when his Microsoft powered automobile crashes, and he is presented with the ultimate blue haze of eternal damnation.
Think you can do better? Let us know where you were, are and intend to be by partaking in this weeks Topical Tuesday
Topic: #26 Is it Christmas already?!
Before I begin I would like to post a quick note about recent developments over at Topical Tuesday. In the early days when Topical Tuesday was born, it was decided that every Monday evening a new topic would be posted for participants to ramble about the following day via their blogs. No consideration was given to those poor unfortunates who hold down steady jobs and actually manage to factor a life in there as well. Now we have realised this we have decided to make Topical Tuesday last all week! That is to say a new topic will be posted every Tuesday, for you to contemplate and ponder on all week. Hopefully, at some point, you will manage to set aside five minutes to join us by writing a post.
On I go.
I am atheist. I don´t believe in God. For that reason Christmas is not a period for celebrating Christ´s birth because, rather ironically, I don´t believe in him either.
The reason I celebrate Christmas is quite simple. Not only am I fond of a jolly old shindig, enjoy a present or two and a nice tot of alcohol with my pudding, but I also love my family. I celebrate Christmas essentially because they do. Christmas, for me, is all about family and friends. It’s about celebrating the continuance of life, and the feelings we share.
When I was a child Christmas was about getting together and sharing a good meal. After which we´d be subjected to the Queen´s speech and endless movie / TV re-runs. With the turn of the century Christmas has become a massive marketing event, with tailored goods hitting the shelves as early as October. The simpler Christmas is lost amidst a mad rampage of Christmas shoppers and spoilt children demanding their XBox360. The sparkle of the traditional Christmas still exists, the merry dance of Christmas lights, the smell of mulled wine and spiced orange, and the turkey sizzling away in the oven – it’s just a lot more difficult to find underneath all the marketing camouflage.
Its like beginning to write or draw on a fresh piece of paper or cracking open that brand new notepad or journal for the first time.
When I decided to return to Wordpress after several years of Expression Engine I planned to transfer over all the old entries. Eight years of them to be exact. But the archives never were transferred over. I wrote the module. I tested it once to confirm it works succesfully and then, after all that work, I selected the content and clicked delete. All gone. Every last one.
It was immensely liberating.
You see, after all I have been through this last eight years, the deletion of the old in order to begin afresh was symbolic. I was tired of the constant flicking back to remind myself of what had been – the good and the bad. The old entries, interesting as some were, held me in a past from which there seemed no escape. My writers muse was blocked by eight years of complete and utter gibberish.
I wanted a fresh slate.
So I didnt wipe the old slate clean, I smashed the damn thing. Not only here but in my personal life. I´ve clung to the past too damn long and now I intend to begin anew. I´ve wallowed in guilt, relied too heavily on others, and I have hidden away from life.
Its time to take a fresh approach to writing, to blogging, and most important of all, to life.
All thoughts of spending time at Burgie Horse Trials dissipated when we arrived at our destination. Instead we opted to take to the hills and explore the Highlands.
After a brief stop over just outside Glasgow we headed up to Forres, passing through some of the most spectacular scenery I have ever seen. Whenever I visit Scotland I am left questioning why I spend so much time abroad – when all this is practically on my doorstep (granted, its a 200 mile long doorstep).
We spent one night at a hotel in Inverness, and spent the following day exploring the area – not forgetting to call off at Loch Ness. Having observed no mysterious creatures we left disappointed and headed up the coast to our next port of call – Forres.
Knockomie Hotel has to be one of the best hotels I have stayed at, although I admit that my experience in this department is somewhat limited. We were given a warm and unstuffy welcome, the rooms were comfortable and the food was very good. They even welcomed Joe, who at best is proving a little unsociable when it comes to meeting strangers. Sometimes he greets them openly, other times he can be quite nasty, and for a small dog, intimidating. One of the drawbacks of our stay was that Joe kept us awake most of each night because he would growl every time he heard movement either outside the room, or in an adjoining room.
We didn’t spend much time in Forres however, because as soon as we awoke the next day we ventured out along the North East coastline – passing through Findhorn Bay, Nairn, Burghead, Hopeman, Lossiemouth, Spey Bay, and Cullen. We returned to Findhorn Bay in the evening, and went to a local pub for seafood.
Friday was spent exploring the Highlands – most of the day spent at Cromarty. Had lunch at a little cafe, where poor Mum required me to act as a translator in order to make her order. Poor Mum was certain she had just experienced hearing Scottish Gaelic, I felt a little sad telling her he was speaking English – she just couldn’t follow his accent! As for me, I nearly proposed marriage based on the sound of his voice alone.
More time was spent exploring the Highlands on Saturday, and Skye on Sunday. I love the North West of Scotland – Loch Carron / Loch Alsh areas in particular. But nothing can match the wild untamed beauty of the Scottish Highlands.
We started our journey back on Sunday, calling off at Stirling to spend the night. On Monday we arose early so we could arrive back at home before lunchtime. As they say the best laid plans often fail. A strange rattle in the engine warned us something was amiss as we passed Gretna, four miles later we found ourselves in a layby with a overheated car. A cap had worked its way loose and drained our radiator. With the mobile choosing this moment to go on the blink, I ended up walking up the side of the A74 Southbound to a small farm shop. Not only did they allow me to use their phone they also drove me back to the car! The hour that followed was nerve racking to say the least as our small car was constantly rocked by passing lorries who saw amusement in attempting to clip my wing mirror. Not funny!
Rescue arrived, and it was decided that we were to be driven the whole way home by tow truck. We arrived home 6pm Monday evening, red faced and certain that we had simply pushed our little car too hard in covering over one thousand miles in less than a week.
The experience has left me craving more, and so we are now abandoning all plans of spending Christmas and New Year in Spain in favour of a short break in Scotland for New Year.
My poor attempts at capturing my holiday can be found in my photolog.
